California Closets Suck...At least right now they do!

I have discovered a California living drawback - - wardrobe. Now, at first glance, this may appear silly. Warm weather. You can be easy and breezy! Flip flops and t-shirts galore. However, I lived on the East coast long enough to miss a couple of things. And I admit from the start that this problem, or drawback rather, may just stem from a personal problem but I am willing to share anyway.

On the east coast, most people look forward to buying clothing for the different seasons. Most of us get excited at the thought of buying new summer clothes. Or better yet, we look forward to spring when we can finally start wearing our sandals (showing off our new pedis) and shedding our heavy winter coats. Then, after showing your skin and being hot all summer, we begin to look forward to the idea of shopping for "fall" fashions and buying a new winter coat and sweaters. Well now, by living in sunny California, I feel like I wear the same damn clothes all the time. I am so sick of my wardrobe. The spring/summer clothes that had when I left the east coast feel like my entire wardrobe. I feel like I wear them all the time. And because the seasons don't change (unless you call going from 70-90 degrees a change), I don't have a "justification" for a shopping spree to "renew" my wardrobe. Now of course, I am a woman. I have bought some new items - here and there. However, I am just accustomed to the idea of buying "new" items for a "new" season and then eventually retiring the rags that I just wore for 3-4 months straight. And then, here is the really cool part of the east coast wardrobe culture. Because you don't look at the "last season" clothes consistently for another year, they feel like new when you pull them out again. Its like magic. The old becomes new (supplemented of course, by some new season stuff). Now, I feel like I am still stuck in the season of summer 2004 and 2005, and we are in 2006. Ugh! I say all of this to say .... I'm going shopping. To hell with California and its lack of seasons!

As Many As 100,000 Without Power in Queens

It’s hard to believe that in 2006, the US power companies have not figured out how to keep power on during storms. Hello! Aren’t smart businesses supposed to anticipate challenges and design solutions to solve them? The major challenge for any power company would be a storm. I am just extremely surprised and disappointed that Con Edison hasn’t devised a strategy to prevent long-term periods of no power. They should be ashamed of themselves. The power has been out for over 5 days and predicted to be out through the weekend. I feel for my friends in Queens. Last weekend, during my DC trip, I was staying at my friend, Tinesha’s, house and her air conditioning stop working. I felt like I was in hell - literally. It was like 90 some degrees plus humidity which made it feel like 100+ degrees. Being hot makes me irritable. All I could do was sit very still next to a fan and think cool thoughts. I was miserable. Although I was going to miss my friend and DC, I was happy to get my butt into the air conditioned car headed back home to my air conditioned, no to low humidity, Los Angeles! Stay cool NYC!

To read more about the story, click here.

DC Weekend Warrior

Last weekend, I went to DC for my best friend's (Tinesha) poetry book launch party on Saturday, July 15th at the Alexandria Black History Museum. I took JetBlue my favorite airlines because I get to watch cable TV for free and see where I am on the map. Yes, JetBlue is the only way to fly across country. I digress. Although I got to see my parents briefly, my main reason for jetsetting to DC was to support my girl. Publishing a book, any kind of book, is a major accomplishment. Trust me, I'm trying. It takes self-confidence, belief in yourself, belief in your words, perservance, dedication, talent, and artistry! And in the case of self-publishing, like Tinesha, it takes loot (I told you I would tell it to you straight!). I realized throughout my own personal writing experience and especially this weekend that the most important ingredient was belief in yourself. In fact, Tinesha was introduced by one of the "Great" black women writers, Marita Golden, who said that Tinesha is successful because she believes in herself even when others don't. She believes in herself so much that she is able to convince others to believe in her (like Marita who she convinced to be her mentor). And consequently, she doesn't take NO for an answer. I think most writers, myself included, struggle with questions like - "why am I doing this?" or "will anyone want to read what I write?" or "is this book idea or story idea really a good idea?" Then, one day we realize a couple of things that my girl realized awhile ago. (1) We have to write! Like breathing most writers have this inner need to write, to say something! I think our very happiness depends on it. And (2)at some point on this writing journey, we start believing what we are saying! Yes, this may sound like a wild concept but at some level you must believe in your thoughts - even if they sound a little crazy, silly, stupid, or way out there. To venture into the land of writing and be successful, you have to trust your thoughts and listen to that crazy voice inside your head dying to be expressed. And it helps to surround yourself with people that love and support you and your dreams!

This weekend was motivating and encouraging. It was great to go to my friend's book launch and even serving as Ms. Star Emcee (yes, that's me) but the best part was seeing her achieve one of her biggest dreams. She always knew she wanted to be a writer (like since the 3rd grade) and a poet. She remembered her goal in 2004 to publish her book of poetry. She achieved this major dream. She is very encouraging in a world where people forget about or sell out their own dreams. And now, she is finishing up her first novel, Holla at the Moon, and already has an agent contract. Her book will be marketed to publishers in September! Yes, expect big things from my girl. She's making moves because she believed that she could!

New Delhi or Bust

About a week of so ago, my good friend, Jaramogi, told me via IM that he was moving to New Delhi, India. Whoa! At first I thought he was joking, but quickly realized that he was serious. I forgot who I was talking to. I was talking to a male version of me. Jaramogi and I have always been in tune mystically. We often have the same ideas or at least similar ones and strangely, the thoughts come to us around the same time. I realized that if I was thinking about moving abroad, it is very possible that Jay was also thinking about it too. And the universe quickly responded to his thought! His company has a global rotation program that is going to place him in New Dehli!

I've always wanted to live in abroad, especially in Europe, since I went to school at Oxford in England during college. This experience really broadened my mind and made me yearn for different experiences. It also got me excited about traveling and learning more about the world. It broke me out of the US box and "state-side" thinking and made me into a Global Citizen. This global thinking has gotten me into trouble with some of my more "patriotic" friends when I don't side with the US on international and political issues.

Anyway, I am really going to miss Jay during this time but I am soo excited for him. He promised to come back a Buddha (wink) and use his East Asian History degree from our alma mater, Duke! I can't wait to see pictures, hear about his travels and experiences, and possibly visit him. Here's to new adventures, global citizenship, exploration, and living your dreams!

How Does It Feel to be Married?

Soon after you get married, people always ask you - how does it feel to be married? Well, I'm going to tell it to you straight. The perspective of love and forever changes dramatically when you get married and it is something that you can't understand unless you've experienced it. The relationship is just on a whole other level. Nothing really changes (like in the day to day sense) except that the relationship is now on a higher level and a deeper level with its own set of expectations (probably due in part to the importance of the relationship - heck whole families are formed from these relationships). So in essence, everything changes.

It is also a public relationship so that opens up a whole new can of worms. And women that change their names now wear a public badge that says I've made this commitment and as a result have a lot riding on this deal working out (the name changing issue could be a whole another posting). Single people out there have to understand that it isn't the title "married" or the "fancy wedding" that changes things - it is the vow, it is the commitment. It is the pledge to spend the rest of your life with someone else and to love and honor this person. This person that you see everyday, talk to everyday, make love to and argue with, is no longer just a boyfriend or girlfriend. They are now your life mate. They are someone that you vowed to be with for the rest of your life. This choice should not have been one taken lightly - therefore, the relationship cannot be. And in a moment, those two words, "I do", changed everything. I hope I answered the question.

JG's Words to the Wise

Don't make it a habit to take advice from someone that you wouldn't want to trade places with!

2006 - the Lucky Year of Marriage?!

According to a recent article in the Wall Street Journal, Chinese astrologers state that 2006 is a very lucky year to get married. Now of course, I don't believe everything that I read but I am hoping that in this case - luck and astrology are on my side. Heck, marriages today need all the luck they can get. Is that the reason why Chinese people are trying desperately to get married this year by placing personals, advertising their available children or friends on signs in the park. Or better yet delaying their nuptials or just taking the plunge because 2006 is just too good of a year to pass up.

Well, here are my words of warning ... luck is good and necessary for marriage but love, understanding, respect and a solid foundation are also keys to success. So people, unless you are ready to get married, I don't think you should follow the Chinese on this one. I'll let you know in 50 years if there was anything to this lucky year thing. We'll have solid divorce rates by then to judge. Did that sound pessimistic?

To read the actual article, click here (reprinted in The Miami Herald).

Make Your Ass Clap or Ride a Bike?

There is this new singer out of Leeds, United Kingdom by the name of Corinne Bailey Rae. I am not sure if I should classify her sound as soul, R&B, neosoul or Pop but her debut song, "Cput Your Records" is a little boring to me. However, the reason I'm talking about her actually has nothing to do with her talent or her debut song or even music classification (that could be another post), but rather her music video. As many of you are aware if you watch BET or MTV and check out a rap, hip hop, or several of the "black" music videos, they can be easily distinguished by the black women dancing in the video with hardly any clothes on. And their dancing leaves nothing to the sexual imagination. The girls gyrate and shake their asses like strippers or more commonly known among black men and the hip hop generation as making their ass clap. Well, lodged smack between these ass videos comes Rae's video for her new debut. Was she shaking her ass? No. Was she dancing? No, not really, unless you count swaying and shaking as dancing. Miss Rae was riding a bike. Riding a bike?! Yes, ladies and gentlemen, music conosouirres, she is riding a bike through a grassy meadow. Her video made me think about the way black women are portrayed in music videos. They are either highly sexualized or almost sexually dead. Its like one extreme or the other. Did her video producers or Rae herself think that bike riding in a video was her only option? Or perhaps I am simply missing some great artistic pursuit here? Its possible, though not likely. Its just a video (somewhat boring video) of a black girl singing and riding through a meadow. Or maybe riding a bike is sexual? Hmmm.. Naaah! It just made me ask the question - are black women in music videos forced to choose between clapping their asses or riding on bikes??? One of my favs for her beauty, style and orinality, Kelis, had this to say on the topic when recently asked by SPIN magazine for their June issue. "Will I clap my ass in video? Ugh, no". I think her comment sums it up quite nicely. If you want to read more from Kelis, buy the SPIN magazine.

I don't have an answer here people. I just thought it was interesting point to ponder especially as we consider how black people are portrayed in the media. If you'd like to buy Rae's CD, click here. Kelis' CD isn't due out until late July/early August 2006.

Guess Who's Back...

Okay, okay. I know I deserve a good lashing for waiting over 3 months to post again. Hey! Hey! I've got a good excuse and its summed up in one word - WEDDING. Yes, I got married. And for those that don't know why that one word is synonymous with time drain, just ask somebody that planned a wedding worth attending. Although I am now pleased with myself and all the hard work that it took for me to pull of this wedding, damn it was a lot of work and it really zapped all my time and energy. I would have every intention of posting to my blog but my free time would just dissipate after working on one of the 1000 items on the to do list or dealing with these "stuck-up for no reason" wedding boutique salespeople, or talking to the "oh-so-exhausting order taker" in Anguilla, I mean wedding coordinator. Did I say that outloud? I hope that didn't sound bitchy but hey... I promised the truth on this blog. Well, for those that didn't attend the wedding, it turned out great. I don't have any real complaints or wedding nightmares. Were things perfect, hell no?! But all things considered and with all the thousands of details, things turned out really well. I'm extremely happy with it. And, I would do it all over again so that statement in and of itself is a measurement of its success. If you are interested in checking out the wedding site (pictures from the wedding still to come - hey its yet another task to post them), please feel free to visit www.brookeandwes.com.

Anyways, I'm back! So expect some crazy posts. I'm keeping it real on this blog. Politically correct people may not want to continue reading... Hey maybe I should put a warning label on my spot? Stay tuned.